Things I Learned Today (But really should have known already)

1) Only the tips of the strawberries are edible to a two year old.

2) When I say, “Get up and get dressed! We have to leave for Little Gym in ten minutes,” the 10 year old hears, “Why don’t you stay in your pajamas and play with the baby for ten minutes.”

3) For the hour we are away from the house and I forget the diaper bag, the baby will poop.

4) Humidity and graham crackers don’t mix.

5) I can save a lot of money on zoo and aquarium memberships by just going to the pet store.

6) When I say, “Pack yourself a snack and water for camp later while I feed the baby,” the 10 year old hears, “Why don’t you make a messy experiment in the kitchen while not eating any lunch before you go to camp for the afternoon.”

7) There is enough speed in just putting the minivan in reverse to do this to my side mirror.

8) Two year olds can learn to say 'sh*t' really fast.